I have a whole life apart
Somewhere, unseen and unaware
Subconscious somewhere
Always ready to depart.
And I’ve lost my passion
I don’t write my dreams anymore
Nowadays waking sober and sore
Leaving no room for another lore.
So, close the door.
No, I mean it.
Since when did you decide I was too fit
For your standards? And sit.
I won’t let you split.
I’ve lost a lot already and then I dreamt of you
As my soul hovered,
Right across the house, over.
I believed I was dying
And so as they say, my memories were flying
They reminded me of crying
When you’re about to expire
At your feet, inspire.
One last time.
To feel the soul leave, now I know.
But how to die, I don’t.
Till you tell me, I won’t.
Will it be a fall from the heights that my legs shake upon?
Or a loss in a fight to the step-mother’s son?
Maybe lazy a drive through the college street
More likely a demon sized in my aunt’s outfit.
It’s sounding more normal and simpler by the day
Like a sunset priming the autumn air in gray
Only two stories, I’m going my way
Either in war if my God ever say
Or my skin I hate, I’ll start to flay.
When I die, I die anyway
No room for confessions, just an eternity to pay.
Just note how I craved Your name in my tongue
When I was all trapped and cold
Hoping You’d forgive me for once
To let You know I have my faith, and to get You sold.
✍ Ithmam Hami, 15th October, 2022
An Escapist 